Laws of Matriarch

April 2016: Grandmother's Update on My Grandson Hello, everyone.  I want to share an update on my journey to bring my grandson home. As I prepare to get him on May 31, 2016, under a Temporary Custody Order, I feel the weight of this system pressing down on me. The ministry will not provide any financial support, such as child tax benefits, until July 14th. This is yet another inhumane policy that puts me in a precarious position, making me feel like I have to beg for what should be rightfully ours. I’ve been reflecting on my feelings of anger towards some family and friends. Some understand my struggle, while others don’t. I’ve lost connections because I get overly defensive and sensitive. If anyone speaks poorly about me or my children, they should expect to face the wrath of a mother bear. I will not stand for it. I’ve been fighting to get my grandson out of ministry care, and this battle against Canadian laws has been exhausting. I feel a constant anxiety from the convoluted and...

Letter from a Grandmother - April 20, 2016 I want to share an update on my journey to bring my grandson Angel home from Ministry custody. He is now 10 months old, and every day away from him feels like an eternity. I’ve attached a letter I wrote to Westcoast Leaf, UBCIC, and Jody Raybould Wilson, hoping my experience can help other grandparents who find themselves in similar situations. Since reaching out to these community organizations, I’ve noticed some positive movement in my case. It’s a reminder that when we share our stories, we can spark change—not just for ourselves, but for others too. Recently, my home study was approved, even though I didn't have all the baby items required beforehand. I was able to pick up a small first aid kit and two gates just a few days after receiving that approval. I’ve attached the email confirming the home study approval for your reference. Today, I received a court application from VACFSS to have Angel placed in my custody under section 41(1)...

Update: A Letter to Anyone Listening My grandson is almost 10 months old, and I find myself filled with sadness and frustration as I navigate this challenging journey.  I’ve found two daycares for him, but I’ve lost both spots. It feels like I’m running in circles, trying to secure a future for him. I still haven’t been served papers to go to court for a temporary custody order, which leaves me in limbo. I can’t get daycare covered until I have my grandson in my care, but I can’t hold a daycare spot without him. It feels like a cruel game of “catch-22.” I can’t take maternity leave because I’m neither a parent nor a foster parent in the eyes of the system. I work full time, but I’m worried about losing my job if I take an unpaid leave. The fear of becoming homeless looms over me if I step back from work.  The process with VACFSS has become so burdensome, and I’m left feeling trapped in a precarious position as a low-income single parent. My file has been frozen since the last ...

Thoughts for Today Have you ever wondered what women mean when they say, "We are not your Pan Am Indians"? I imagine it speaks to the stereotypes that often overshadow our true essence—those images that the world tries to pin on us. Sometimes, I see our people playing the part, acting in ways that might help them get ahead when dealing with non-Natives. I hear phrases like "in a good way," or comments that downplay our knowledge, as if we don’t know our own words. Everyone seems to become a pipe carrier, and some even grow their hair long or wear traditional dresses to fit a mold. But we Gitxsan are simple people. We don’t romanticize the Spirit; we recognize that we are all equal, gifted in our own ways by the Creator. God is within us and with us, and every thought we have is a prayer in itself. Our limited contact with white society has allowed us to hold onto our traditional teachings, so ingrained in us that it can be difficult to explain. There’s no need for g...

A Grandmother's Plea for Support My grandson Angel is just 9 months old, yet he’s already in the care of the ministry. As his grandmother, I am fighting to bring him home, but the path ahead is riddled with obstacles. I recently sent a letter to Team Leader Claudia, with @Puglaas CC'd, to express my concerns about the system. If I could apply for guardianship through the Family Law Act (FLA), I would have had my grandson in my arms within a few months. But the BC government has cut the 'Child in Home of a Relative' program, leaving low-income families like mine with no options. The FLA is now out of reach, forcing us into a convoluted Child Protection process under the CFCSA. It’s disheartening to face delegated agencies meant for Aboriginal children. There’s nothing truly Indigenous about them; their policies and procedures are often just as oppressive, if not more so.  Last month, I was fortunate enough to secure a legal aid lawyer through an exception review. My l...

Update on My Journey to Bring My Grandson Home As a Gitxsan grandmother navigating the complexities of the child welfare system, I want to share my experience and shed light on the struggles many Indigenous families face.  My grandson is now 7.5 months old and has spent his entire life in care. This is a painful reality that many Aboriginal children endure, and the challenges I face grow heavier each day, especially when it comes to daycare and subsidies. Recently, I spoke with David, the fourth social worker assigned to my grandson Angel’s file in just seven months. He explained the process of the childcare subsidy after I reached out to the Childcare Subsidy office. David informed me that I would need Angel in my custody before I could receive any support. It’s frustrating because I’m merely following the instructions given to me by previous social workers. This back-and-forth is exhausting. David mentioned he tried to meet with me in December to discuss a “TCO”—a Temporary Custo...

I don't want to feel scared of being the next murdered women .   I Don’t Want to Be a Statistic I don’t want to feel the chill of fear,   Waking in the night, haunted by the whispers—   The cries of our sisters, the missing and murdered,   Echoing through the shadows, lingering in the air.   You may see the #MMIW tag,   Scrolling past it like a forgotten story,   But for us, it’s not just a hashtag;   It’s a reality, a reminder of lives lost,   Of dreams shattered,   Of women taken,   Their voices silenced.   For years, I’ve watched the arguments unfold,   Organizations and communities debating how to protect,   But where is the action? Where is the change?   Women plead for fairness and safety,   Yet the world turns a blind eye.   If murderers only targeted white men,   At the same rate we lose our Aboriginal women,   Would that spark outrage? Would that be fair?   If just as many w...